I/my family sat in the hospital while my mom had a tumor removed, i and my family lost our home and everything pretty much, me and my family lost my mom and my grandpa, me and my family went through struggles and hurt and this is just some of the highlights, I also went through back and leg surgery. Alcoholism, addiction, hatred toward myself and others, suicidal thoughts, I believed life was nothing and never would be, I thought God abandoned me.
But in truth I abandoned hi...m.

If you would have told me that me a snaughty little brat that got everything he wanted back in the day, spending fortunes on games and things to satisfy my urge to have more, would soon go to church camp and become a different man with a gentle heart and that I would go through all this suffering and wrong choices would end up today happy and being closer to God then ever before, I would have thought you we're a fool.
People please stop low balling Jesus and complaining life sucks because it doesn't get better, because God has left you there. God never left you it is you who turned from him, how do I know? Because I am and was that man/boy.
I got a news flash Jesus is real and he is good! And he is the way, stop spending your energy to run from him when all you gotta do is turn around and fall into his arms!!
I am gonna take everything the enemy told me I was and I am gonna watch the enemy shake and fall underneath my feet as a spread and confess the grave of God! He saved me and he can save you too!
Pastor bob told me I was gonna preach like a lion and help many young people and nothing is gonna keep me from that

That still moment all alone as you sit quietly in your chair, the creeks and noises of the house, those faint whispers as the wind passes by.
Scratches you hear? those overgrown bushes and you could never forget the smell of the candles as the burn freely.
Left to ponder in your own mind as the time passes with not a moment feeling as if it will pass by, tears of the journey's that have struggled through yet still somehow you are still aware and awake prepered and destined t...o win over every mistake.

Hide in the shadows you should not, you listen for noises that should have been forgot, remember the truth is not what you arnt but who you are, exactly who he intended you to be so next time you sit in the place of selience seek the memories that bring you happy thoughts and never entertain those voices of your enemy the truly lie tremendously

If I gave you a list of the thing I missed and how my time was spent in bliss, how the struggle I felt was so real lost in memory of things that don't return yet redeemed I stand here not a lone

Around a year ago I had no job, couldn't hardly walk, was in very deep depression and not mention my addiction.
Today I have 2 jobs paying for my rent, food, phone and all that good stuff.
On top of becoming a youth leader and I have a awesome girlfriend!
My depression is gone and my old addiction is gone.
...

Can it get a amen?
God rewards the humble and believe me living for him is much better then for yourself

Do not live today for tomorrow, for a man/women who plans for something that is yet to come surely plans there own destruction.
But be fruitful and great full for the time at hand and know tomorrow is already taken care of

I think sometimes the world sees a good person but because of the way things are, feel the needs to question the goodness of that person when no test is needed.

There is good in the world you just got believe in it

I wandered for days in the crippling woods, so many things heard but not seen, the twigs would crack, wolves would howl, It  seems as if  the only thing relate full was the sky still blue and as always I could see the moon. In some mysterious way I felt safe again I knew if I just kept looking up I would find my way back home.

Are you struggling? Caught in the wilderness of the world, well my friend eyes to the sky he is watching and he loves you

The world claims that God is false because the chaos we bring upon ourself, now I could get into detail but let me ask, if I shoot someone do I have the right to say your to blame for not doing something to stop it?

We have free will, you can't just simply stop something that never ends, which is sin!

eminem Let's pretend, Marshall Mathers never picked up a pen
Let's pretend, things would've been no different
Pretend he procrastinated had no motivation
Pretend he just made excuses that was so paper thin
They could blow away with the wind
Marshall you never going to make it
Makes no sense to play the game there ain't no way that'll you win
Pretend he just stayed outside all day and played with his friends.

me
let's pretend, mickey never became a christian, let's pretend i never repented for all of my sin, life would be so different, pretend i just gave up and threw my beliefs and the blew away with the wind, pretend my vision was so dark i never even begin.

pretend i was not awkward and was social as a kid and i had a idea of what it was like to fit in, let us pretend i stopped taking everybody's crap and became my own person, stop allowing people to step on me and look down upon my progress, let us pretend i forgot about all the people who shot me down and still do, the ones i have seen. church use to be called safety now most are just a fake industry, pretend you see it from my view i don't lie to myself to make things better.

i guess i did't get that, i never stopped and i hope the world didn't miss that, i put my energy into holding onto the wish that never came but that is okay because his love is always the same, i know at the dark times and moments it feels a little down and these words feel like a infection spreading around, i just gotta say i never stop trying and if no one sees... well that would be okay with me, cause i can see the goodness and strength in me and so can he. God gave me a vision maybe one day ill be a preacher beyond the worlds decision or a singer tour the world and everyday will be my mission. wherever will work for me as long as it is a distant from my original life

Blood shed never was a reality, you'd think n here in this state of decay we would find our actions gone within in a small reaction.

Keep truth but know the truth between life and satisfaction, death over stilled distraction that will and has blinded us with no remorse or retraction. anger beyond our own self intentions allowing ourself to be controller by fear and false direction.

Look to the sky because without him you surely are destined to die, this world is crumbling and Jesus can put the pieces back together

i asked myself how my writings have become more and more deep not to add the have surely improved.

when i write i find myself in a place nobody cares to wander, joyful yet a dark place, a distant deep inside me with shackles that are bound to me no matter where i hide, the cold metal that chills my body as i attempt to free myself, is this twisted? am i sane?

remember people lol these are writings i am okay!

how can you be afraid of pain? when you witnessed all you could bare and almost became numb? maybe i am just over sensitive, maybe my battle is larger in the spirit world, a battle not between life and material work but between the devil that seeks to destroy me and remove my hope, is it possible to be devoured from the inside? when you are completely together on the outside .

i am not weak maybe confused, different perhaps

i see the wind blow as the steady day begins to fade to grey, i pick my feet up and i am on my way, i write everything in riddle to some i must say because i see things differently in a unique way, i express myself through my writing and singing, it gives a sense of comfort so i may keep on moving with meaning.

lyrics genius naw just a truthful speaker, i write things strong because i don't wish to be weaker, i feel to express ones self you should express completely.

poem
i saw humanity once for what it was, a stilled feeling i felt a cold rush run down my spine to find i had simply traveled to far into my very mind. why do i care which way the other strays? beyond even this the one who has drifted away.
now surely i have witness the darkness of the world i must say but lived long enough to know there is joy to be had in each day. i strive to keep myself at bay and be a light to others a long the way.

A saint you say? in no way do i portray this act in anyway, judgment i tend to stick away i am not a fan of picking the wrongs although i have had times were i have been very wrong. my simple point to say i will be the best each and everyday hoping i can help those who fall behind or that have lost there way, hoping i may rescue them from there dismay.

i am not here to be perfect, i don't follow every rule and i am a sinner of that i am the worst but i do believe the man upstairs cares for me and you. and as much as aideny it i know there is hope, just reach out your hand

Stand on soil the moist density of the ground you portray on, wandering blindly as you feel the wind brush across you're skin, a chill of the cold as you hold completely still alone but almost at peace. The darkness comes a thicksickness as our vision blurs, lead into a destructive state we find as this once so beautiful place crumbles, the ground shakes the trees start to fall and the wind roars with violence, suddenly we are not a lone but surrounded by our fear and regrets, as the world adds in all of the lies it has consumed.
I hope will surely appear, are you out in the dark? Afraid you will be starved or taken under by these earthly scars breath for the hope is above, a light beyond all darkness can bring you from your once so distant status, to be renewed and loved, purpose, reasoning , destiny, a King not many proclaim and fail to see, take it from me step out and embrace him and surely you Will be saved. Don't take advice of the others for every relationship with the Father is unique so find him yourself and know him for who he is, a savior

For those of you who missed out on my poem tonight here it is. Live lpc

poem for Lpc Friday night

days come and go, as we travel through dark and colorful places, our imagination has come too know so well. 
a struggle we push ourselves through as we catch the world bleeding through.

we fight with what is inside. you can see by the glimmer in my eyes. how it feels to die but be fully alive. waves crash around as we adjust to telling everyone we are fine, while slowly falling far behind.

yet a light arised upon our unbalanced yet progressive lives. have you ever imagine why the sun sets? or the stars shine, a simple yet extraordinary design, by a man with a very unique mind.

is it not true? a flower blooms or that a seed grows, look at the river the way the current flows, all beyond the works of anyman. next time the enemy leaves a trace of doubt behind, lift your head upon the sky and know it is such a miraculous design

would you choose to lay in pieces as the wind blows you a far? or build a new story by day break before you loose it all?

Some say I am a poet, I'll prove it before you even know it . I write my words in mystery, if you know my writing history. You'll find the awnsere while listening.

Stars shine but not as bright as the moon, maybe if the connected the could reach past the sun. My feeling are not puns, I aimed them to be direct. How long can a person be in the shadows before the get caught in a mass effect?

I ain't trying to run away but something feels unstable when I come this way. Holding together everything I hold forever .

And so I step out, ain't no backing out, when your in your in, got a lot of things for us to believe in. Accept we are holding the key so what then.

Gonna break through God is near holding you, just out of sight, seems like all you do is debate every night, when already know everything you are stressing for, was thrown out the day the King walk through that door.

Listen hear these voices calling out, gospel following through these people are bleeding out. What sin is next? To be correct. All these words brought back with a false dialect.

our hearts caught in the side effects, oh yeah I guess since we are now running the show its ok to have negative side effects. Devil reaching out to everyone with a open mind, get inside a take your soul for less then a dime, only true crime is we accept, when lucifer says fall in line